Wanted: Refuge

'Barbed wire is nothing,' our mother tells us. 'Nothing,' she continues, even as our fingers are pricked and our clothes are snagged, 'compared to our freedom.'

   Anesh and I screech as we scramble over the fence. Mami is waiting on the other side, stretching her arms up to meet us. She isn’t as strong as Papi so she can’t catch us very well, but she tries her best. I miss Papi. Mami said we lost him in the war, but I don’t know where he went or how he got lost because he always seemed to know where he was going.

   Anesh demands to be picked up but Mami doesn’t have the strength. He cries and Mami tells him to save his tears because today we are leaving our homeland. Mami says that we are in a new place now, but it doesn’t look any different on this side of the fence. The sand is still burning my feet and it’s still hot and I’m still thirsty.

   We follow Mami. It isn’t long before we can see the ocean. It looks nice and cold and I want to run to it. There are lots of people on the beach like they are having a meeting. Mami is holding me on one side and Anesh on the other and she drags us along while she talks. She argues with a man until he gives up and then we are in a line of people moving towards a big yellow boat.

Its sides are squishy and I almost fall over. A red thing is pushed over me and my ears get stuck to the side of my head so I can’t hear properly. Anesh gets one too and he looks funny with no ears. They suddenly pop back up and it makes me laugh.

   We are pushed off from the beach and bob away. There are lots of people in the boat and some are paddling so there are elbows everywhere.

There is a baby next to us. It is thin and ugly and I don’t want to be near it. The baby reaches out with its flailing arms and catches my little finger. I am about to push it away from me when Mami smiles. I want Mami to smile at me more so I keep holding the baby’s hand, even though it is warm and sticky and I don’t like it.

   It is difficult to breathe next to all the people. I am getting thirstier and I ask why we cannot drink when all I can see is water. There is a little bit of water in the bottom of the boat and I take a handful when Mami isn’t watching. I spit it out again because it tastes like salt and it burns my throat. Mami tuts and says something to the baby’s mother, who looks at me like I’m stupid.

I lie down and look at the sky. There aren’t any clouds but there are lots of fluffy white trails, which Mami says are from planes. I think I fell asleep for a while because Mami covered me with her scarf so the sun didn’t burn me and it tickled my nose.

   There is suddenly a big noise. There are boats everywhere, like ants swarming when you drop a hot cake on the ground. Some of them are big and they growl at us. Others are small and pretty and the colour of flowers.

I didn’t notice before but the yellow boat is sinking. I am in the water and it is in my mouth and all I can taste is salt. The red squishy thing keeps my head above the water. Everyone is screaming and I can see Anesh splashing around next to me in his own red thing. I can’t see Mami anymore. She didn’t have a red thing and neither did the baby. The boats are circling us like sharks and people are shouting in a strange language that I can’t understand. They throw us things to hold on to and I grab a big orange ring and pull Anesh with me. We are dragged on to a plastic boat and I hug Anesh and pretend that we’re ok, even though I don’t know if we are.